The package on my doorstep had my name, but I definitely didn’t order it. The knock on the door had woken me from my half sleep. I had always slept early since I lost the memory of some of my life events. I had no idea how that even happened. The only thing I knew was that I lived with mama and six siblings. I didn’t know the name of our next-door neighbor and didn’t even bother to ask. I was suspicious of everyone and everything, with a feeling that I had forgotten something, but didn’t know what it was.First, I was scared to open the door and check it out. Whoever delivered it had disappeared into thin air. I was not used to opening the door after 6 O’clock, until my siblings returned from the restaurant. But this time I later decided to open and pick it fast, and check. That way my siblings would not know what I had received and my privacy wouldn't be compromised. It was a tiny wooden box, with my name engraved. It didn’t look newly engraved! Was it prepared for me long time and just waited for this day? Or is there someone—or should I say something?—that knows what is happening to me? The thought about that made me the more curious and was compelled to open the box.‘A rattle and a goat’s tail! Whoever sent this must be kidding me.’ I thought to myself, feeling so bitter. But a part of me, deep in the inside, remained calm. It told me there had to be a reason for this package. My feeling shifted from curiosity to anger and disappointment. Yes, I didn’t expect anything, but at least it should have been something straight forward for me to understand. But wait! What if I was not supposed to understand! Maybe I just needed to keep this under my bed and it would make me remember everything I had forgotten. This had bothered me for the previous few weeks and I badly wanted to remember at least some tiny details. I sensed a strange scent in the room. It smelt so good that I was curious to know the source. Could it be the rattle? Or the goat’s tail? I picked the box and sniffed both. It was indeed the tail. The smell was so luring that I involuntarily picked the tail from the box and sniffed it again. “Bamulya ekiro!” I remembered that scent. It was from flowers of some tree. But I don’t remember where I had seen the it. I sniffed again, but no details came to me. I started sniffing it continuously until I felt dizzy. I tried to sit down, but lost my balance. The box fell down and the rattle made a sound as it rolled on the floor. I tried to catch it but I didn’t have enough strength. I became dizzier, and felt like something was entering my body. The rattle was still rolling on the floor and making sounds. The sound turned from noise into a more organized form. The appearance of my room changed at every sound made by the rattle until I seemingly fell asleep, only to wake up in a new home that looked familiar. Baba, dressed in his brown wide collared shirt and extra-large trousers was packing things in a sack and carrying them to the outside. A tall man, who must have been in his middle twenties, was outside tying the sacks on a bicycle.‘Agiro prepare yourself and we go. This is my friend, Kipyeko, that we met in the market the other day. Don’t you see his cap?’Pointing at his cowboy cap reminded me of what we had agreed on that day. Baba had told me he wanted to give mama some space due to the growing misunderstanding between them.‘Mwana wange nyoko nagya kunyita (My child your mother will kill me).’ He had said. ‘I want to first go somewhere for a long time. Do you want to come with me you would rather stay’. I remember I had told him, without hesitation, that we would go together. I was all he had (and he was all I had). My siblings had abandoned us and went to stay with mama in the trading centre.His cowboy friend had finished tying our luggage on the carrier. Baba held my hand and we started our journey. It had just clocked dawn yet still too dark outside. I was afraid of figures that may be lurking in the trees. I could somehow see the trees moving past us for every step we took.“Baba where are we going?”“You will see when we reach there.” He had responded and I didn’t ask any more questions.For about two kilometers I didn’t say anything. Baba talked with his friend how mama mistreated him and he had decided to go away with his favorite child (of course that was me). We were now approaching a stream in the valley.‘The good thing we have moved very early and our departure will not be noticed until late in the evening when we don’t go to dinner. Let’s hurry and cross.’Baba had hardly finished the last word when a motorcycle came from behind, flashing lights directly at us. We gave way for it pass. It was carrying two men and a woman. A few feet ahead, it stopped and then came a familiar voice.‘You can go whenever and wherever you want, but leave my child.’ Mama demanded, her tone filled with more with anger and frustration than mere concern. Did she really want me to stay because she loved me? Or did she just have her own personal reasons? She stayed with my six siblings and I was all that baba had. I was not willing to return home with her and abandon my father.‘Let’s ask him and see where he wants to go. I never forced him to go with me.’ Baba pulled me from behind him so they could get my opinion on my preference for a parent. Mama moved closer and cunningly handed to me a folded piece of cloth. I didn’t know what it contained and so did not resist. She blew air at the cloth and caused me to breath in the weird smell that emanated from it. She seemingly whispered some words to me, though I never heard anything. ‘Agiro whom do you want to go with?’ she had asked in a seductive tone.Oh, now a remember it all. It’s that smell that made me forget everything about baba. I immediately ran to mother and said I wanted to go back with her. I didn’t even know or think anything about baba at that time. It had since felt like he never existed in my life. But now I clearly remember how he looked at me during that time of separation, his eyes filled with regret. He had stared at the folded piece of cloth I was holding in my hands, but did not say anything. He must have known about its impact on me immediately. At least he knew I could never choose anyone else over him.I sneezed twice and then woke up from the sleep. I remembered everything, but didn’t know what to do with the information. I definitely could not confront mama about it. When I picked the goat’s tail and rattle to put them back in the box, there was a letter I had not seen earlier at the bottom of the box.‘I left for you something under the bamulya ekiro tree in the village. You should go tomorrow and check it. If you still want to go with me, I will be at our favorite place in the market next week. Don’t worry I am not mad at you because I know what happened’.
