The whistle shrilled.
Like clockwork, the swimmers dived into the pool. Six different colours of swimsuits for the six houses, blue, red, yellow, green, purple and white.
The crowd cheered and screamed, students called out names of their friends or house colours, urging them to go faster.
I was the only one present not caught up in the euphoria of the moment. The sound of the bodies as they hit the pool kept re-echoing in my mind like a bad tape. It was like an out of body experience. I was transported back to my childhood, heard the splash of a body as it hit the water, and sank.
My mother’s pained screams replaced the excitement of the crowd and once again I was a spectator in a problem I had caused. I was eight again, watching the dead bloated body as it laid facedown.
A rough shove jolted me from my reverie. The student mumbled an apology and continued running forward in excitement.
The race was over. From the shouts of the crowd, it seemed red house had won the gold, blue the silver medal, and yellow house the bronze medal. I should have been among those congratulating Sheila, the yellow house contestant, she had just won a medal for my house. I couldn’t bring myself to go close to the pool, it was best to stand at a distance.
"Tell anyone the truth about the kidnapping and everybody will find out what you did."
The message that appeared in my phone Friday night was still ringing in my head. It was a bit cryptic but I guess what mattered was I got the message.
If I told anyone the real story of Theodora's disappearance, my life as I knew it was over. Finished. Ended.
You know the funniest thing? I wasn't eager to tell anyone what happened. It’s not as if I was running around telling everyone who cared to listen that Theo faked her kidnapping with the help of a mysterious person and I knew and never told anyone. Who would I even tell that wouldn’t look at me like a crazy person? Nobody! I wasn't ready to destroy my life, no please, thank you very much.
All I had to do was move on with my life. I just had to pretend I never knew what happened. Had to ignore the constant chest and stomach pains which always heightened whenever I walked past Theo's house. I just needed to keep my head down and my mouth shut. I could do that. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
Theo had been paranoid about her accomplices (a better name than fake kidnapping scheme assistant) finding out she reached out to me. The WhatsApp chat we shared was set to disappear daily. She didn’t save my contact on the phone and asked me not to save the number. All the precautions she took and yet, someone still found out. The worst part was they had traced it to me.
However, they had known it was me was another issue altogether. Unless it was someone who knew me already. Who recognised my voice when they called? The problem was, who did Theo and I know that was crazy enough to agree to a fake kidnapping scheme?
I glanced around me warily. What if it was a student? My eyes met Tami's. She and Jessica were at the other end of the pool, standing with some of Jessica's hostel mates. Instead of averting my gaze as usual, I held her gaze till she looked away uncomfortably. I didn't try to stop the grin that spread across my face.
Two junior students walked past me, chattering excitedly. They glanced at me and paused, exchanged wary glances and walked off much faster.
"Maybe my grin was more maniacal than victorious." I mused.
Ever since Theodora’s death, everyone at school started treating me differently. While the teachers exhibited unwarranted and exaggerated displays of affection and support, including hugs, and most appreciated, giving me better grades than I deserved. The students were another matter; most thought I had gone mad. I was avoided like a pariah. That also worked well for me, human interactions no matter how little only filled me with irritation.
I made eye contact with Tami again. It wasn't difficult since she kept casting worried glances in my direction. I gave her another prize winning smile and walked towards her. Her eyes widened in panic and she tapped Jessica who frowned at being interrupted from her conversation. None of us looked away as I shuffled through the crowd, hands in my shorts' pocket. It didn't take long to get to where they stood. Tami opened her mouth to speak and I moved to the right and walked to where Coach Becky and Coach Ify, the swimming coach stood talking.
Kelly 1 – 0 Tami and Jessica
"Good morning Coaches."
Having one up my former friends had been the only thing on my mind. Now I stood in front of Coach to have a much needed and heavily avoided conversation, my throat felt like I had scrapped it with sandpaper.
"Kelechi. How wonderful. I thought I'll never see you again." Coach Becky's ice-cold tone and booming voice sent curious glances our way.
I kept my eyes fixed on the ground. "I'm sorry I've been away from practice without any notice. It won't happen again."
She sighed. "Let's walk."
Without waiting for a response she marched off leaving me running after her.
I followed her out of the pool side and into the basketball court which was just a few metres away. the basketball team was practicing on the field. The match stopped when Coach and I walked in.
"What are you looking at?" Coach Becky growled.
"Did I say you could stop playing?"The game promptly resumed after that.
She led me to the small plastic seats reserved for spectators and sat down, while motioning for me to sit.
"We had to leave that place. Too many prying eyes. And I know you're not comfortable around water."
HOW HAD SHE NOTICED? DID SHE KNOW? I tried to calm my racing heart and looked at her hands instead.
"I'm sorry for your loss. Losing someone is always painful. The pain never completely goes; you just learn to live with it."
She continued. "At the same time, you have a responsibility to this team as co-captain. You have a responsibility to ME as your coach. So there's nothing wrong in walking up to me and saying, Coach I'll be out of action for a while. Coach I have a hand injury so I can't play. Don't you think that would have been better than walking out on your team in the middle of an important competition? Or am I too scary to talk to?"
"Don't even answer that." She sighed.
"We're in the quarter finals for the MILO tournament. So we've been practicing like crazy. Things are really intense right now. So I'll accept your resignation and ..."
"What? NO!" I jumped up.
"Pardon?"
"I'm not quitting the team." I needed basketball right now. I needed something to make me forget how fucked up my life was. Needed to forget Theodora would still be alive if I did the right thing. Forget how I was being blackmailed for being a big, stupid coward.
"Look Coach Becky, I know I've been out of it and I'm sorry. But please I can't quit. Let me play with the team."
"We're defending champions of the tournament, and I want to win again. I need my players physically, mentally and emotionally sound."
"I am." She raised an eyebrow. "Okay maybe I'm not. But basketball helps. It really does. The match against St Catherine's for example."
"You played adequately well there."
"You see. So let me play." I pleaded.
Footsteps stopped behind us. I turned to see Alex and Temiye, another teammate behind us.
"Coach we didn't mean to eavesdrop." Temiye started.
"But you did."
"Yes, but ..."
"Next time try not eavesdropping. Back to the court."
"We need Kelly back." Alex lowered her voice. "We barely won our last match. The team we're playing next; they won't make the mistake those guys did that allowed us win."
"Are you telling me how to run my team?"
"I'm making a suggestion. As your captain." Temiye and I exchanged worried glances as Coach and Alex had a stare down. Finally, Coach nodded."Alright then."
Temiye jumped up squealing while Alex and I grinned.
"She can rejoin the team, BUT, on probation. Skip a day of practice. Show up late. Look at me the wrong way, smile too much and you're OUT. Understood?"
I nodded. "Yes Coach."
"Now get back on the court." She snapped. "Kelechi wait." She said as I turned to follow them. "If it gets too much up here." She pointed to her head. "You know where my office is. If you're feeling overwhelmed or you've simply had enough, come and see me immediately. That is not a suggestion. Is that clear?"
"Crystal clear." I nodded."Good. Get out there and play good basketball before I kick you out again."
Basketball practice went well afterwards. I was aware of Coach's eyes on me all through the game and made sure I played my best. It was 2pm when Coach blew her whistle.
"I heard some of you have another event going on now. Also your house mistresses have been talking my ear off about how I'm hogging all the talent. Your interhouse sports day is next week Saturday, right? "
She continued without waiting for a response. "I know most of you are also doing other activities for your house like running or playing football or volleyball and all those other lame sports. So get off my court. I'll see you tomorrow." With those parting words, she walked off the court.
I caught up with Alex as she walked out of the field.
"Hi."
"Oh hi."
"I wanted to apologise for Friday. I was rude. I'm sorry."
She shrugged. "It's all good. I shouldn't have approached you then."
"I'm really sorry about that."
"It's okay."
"Thanks for helping out with Coach too."
"That was for me. Did you see the nonsense those girls were playing? We need all the good players we can get."
I laughed. "They weren't that bad."
"Whatever. We're playing Queens next and those girls are rough."
"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow." We were at our classroom block. I just wanted to get my bag and go home.
"You mean in the hall." I turned confused.
"The memorial for Theodora you and your other friends organised?"
My shock must have been very visible because her eyes widened. "You didn't know?"
"Of course I did. It skipped my mind. I can’t believe I forgot."
"Okay. Well it's by 2. You better hurry."
"Yeah." I walked to class in a cloud of anger.
My classmates on clean-up duty were the only ones in the class. As usual, the conversation ended abruptly when I entered. I packed my books roughly and stormed out towards the hall.
I hesitated at the hall entrance then let out a deep breath and walked in. The hall was packed with SS2 students and class teachers. They all sat on plastic chairs facing the stage. Just below the stage was a table with chairs where Tami, Jessica and Mrs. Benson were quietly arguing. I walked towards them.
"Ma she said she's not coming. Let's just start." Tami whined.
"Why won't she want to be here? Didn't Sister talk to three of you?"
"Ma, the thing is she's been very unstable since Theo's passing. This may tip her off or something I don't know. She said she doesn't want to come. She's been avoiding us; we can't force her." Jessica ended with a sigh.
I wanted to walk up to Jessica and slap her. Push her to the floor and drag her by her non-existent hair. Show her what unstable looked like. My fists shook as I stepped forward.
"Still let me send someone to get her." Mrs. Benson insisted.
"No need for that." I spoke up. Tami jumped and looked around uncomfortably. Jessica's eyes widened but she recovered quickly.
"You decided to show up after all." She smirked.
I shrugged. "I thought of how much Theo would have loved this and changed my mind."
I turned to Mrs Benson. "Good afternoon Mrs Benson. Sorry I'm late."
"It's okay. We can start now." She turned to the crowd. "Settle down everyone. We're starting now."
"In our defence." Jessica whispered, "you didn't leave us much of a choice. You've been avoiding us."
"Save it." I whispered back.
"Jessica start the rosary." Mrs Benson said.
"I believe in God the Father Almighty. Maker of heaven and earth. And in Jesus Christ his only son our Lord, who was conceived ..."
Theo would have loved her memorial. The entire set gathered together just because of her. After the rosary, Mrs Benson invited everyone to say their favourite memories of Theo. Tami started and I watched her lie her head off about how Theo never made fun of her weight and stood up for her against people who did.
"Theo was so sweet. She could be blunt but she was honest. I remember when I got stained one time in JSS3 and she brought pads for me the next day ..." my set mate Mercy was interrupted by coos and squealing.
I remembered the incident like it was yesterday. It was during JSS3 extension class and Mercy had gotten stained five times that day. The next day, Theo had shown up with six packs of pads, some tights and panties. We (Jessica, Theo Tami and I) had made her leave the lunch room early and cornered her in the bathroom where we threw the pads on her and forced her to change into one of them, laughing as she wept. She had turned it into a heart-warming story and everyone was lapping it up.
The rest of the memorial consisted of my set mates whitewashing their experiences with Theo. Each time I remembered what really happened, I winced in shame. Every single one of them. Except for Alex who didn't say anything.
"Alright. We're rounding up. It's almost three. I think we'll end with you Kelechi. If that's not too much."
I stood stiffly. "My favourite memories of Theo are both of us in my room, watching a movie or YouTube video, scrolling through social media or just gisting about anything." While as high as kites, of course.
My face grew hot at the coos that followed. "Theo was ..." a self-centred, attention seeking bitch. "A great friend. She knows, knew sorry." I winced. "It's ... it's hard to talk in past tense." I blinked the tears that fell down my eyes.
I cleared my throat. "Like I said, she knew things about me nobody knew. And she never judged me for it." Liar liar pants on fire.
"She was there for me at my lowest moments." At least that’s true.
"I know Theo may have said or done something to you guys you didn't like. There I finally said it." That got me laughter from the crowd.
"Alright. Laugh it off. That's better." By now tears were streaming down my face uncontrollably.
"I hope we remember the good times. And forget the bad." Even though I can't. "Thank you Theo. I love you. Always."
I sat back and put down my head. I didn't stop Jessica and Tami when they rubbed my back as my classmates clapped.
The school bell rang. "Time for Divine Mercy prayers. Stand up everyone." Mrs Benson dabbed her eyes. Once the prayers ended, I took my bag and ran off before anyone could stop me.
Mummy had decided I was strong enough to resume following the school bus she was quote unquote, paying such expensive fees for. The fact that fuel prices had increased AGAIN was perhaps a defining factor.
Once I entered the bus, I put down my head and pretended to sleep till Aunty Florence nudged me to get down at my bus stop.
I endured school for the rest of the week, basketball practice was my saving grace. Once I got home, I was off to the basketball court to keep practising. Aunty Goodness was visiting a relation and the empty house was intimidating to say the least. So I stayed in the court till I saw Mummy driving in and followed her home.
Friday was my off day. I kept missing the basket when shooting, both at school and at home. I was running around the court, huffing and puffing in annoyance when I felt eyes watching me. I looked up and jumped.
Isaac stood on the pavement besides the court. He wore a blue t-shirt with washed brown cargo shorts. His hair looked like he had run his hands through it far too many times. His eyes were bloodshot. I waved and he nodded and entered the court.
He walked to the edge of the court and sat. I said a greeting and kept playing. After a few minutes, I heard his footsteps coming closer.
"Mind if I join you? " he asked.
I tossed the ball wordlessly, not trusting myself to speak. I watched him run with the ball, aim and make the shot that had eluded me all day.
"Are you just going to watch me play? You won't even try to get the ball from me?"
I laughed and raced after him. I got the ball and was about to shoot when the ball was taken from my hands. I ran after him and blocked him. He had a few inches on me and knew how to use them.
After a few minutes, I plopped on the ground exhausted. He soon joined me.
"That wasn’t bad." he sounded out of breath like I did, which pleased me.
"I ran circles round your ass. Good game in my opinion."
"You know I let you win right?"
"If that helps you sleep better at night, sure."
He had a deep throaty laugh which sent a pleasant tingling feeling in my chest.
"Why did we never talk before?"
"Well, you were never really around. Also Theo said her brothers were off-limits." Having a crush on one or two of Theo's brothers was a rite of passage all her friends went through. The realisation that you would never be more than their baby sister's friend often came after that.
"Wow!"
"Yeah. Something about you guys being massive manwhores or something like that."
"That’s harsh. " he laughed. "Somehow I’m not surprised she said that."
His face turned sad and we both sobered up. " You know I left the house to try and escape the whole thing."
He ran his hand round his head. "I just can’t believe it. She’s never coming back. Fuck!" He cursed.
"You’re a stupid spoilt brat. That’s the last thing I said to her. God! I wish I could take it back. This whole thing doesn’t make any sense." He cried, his voice broke at the end.
We sat in silence for a few minutes
"How are you?"
"I should be the one asking you that."
"Yeah but you were her best friend. I’ve been caught up in my own grief recently. I didn’t even stop to think how others may be faring."
"I’ve definitely seen better days. What about your mum?"
"Omo! I’m actually scared for her. She's not taking it well. I'm just praying nothing happens to her."
I felt the guilt twisting deeper in my chest and the familiar chest pain begun. Mummy Timi was suffering, because I was a big coward.
"She even wants to hire a PI … "
"A what?"
"Private investigator." He emphasized the words, lips curled in amusement.
"I know it's crazy right? " he mistook the shock on my face for bewilderment. "I don’t blame her. The police haven’t turned up anything concrete. She’s trying to understand what could have happened."
"I didn’t even know we had PIs in Nigeria. Thought it was a oyibo thing."
"Me too oh."
"Hopefully they uncover something." My heart was running somersaults in my chest.
"That’s if she gets round to hiring him." he scoffed. "If my dad has his way, she never will."
"I don’t think it’s a terrible idea. At least we’ll get some answers."
"Abi. So if anybody is hiding something, they better confess now." He laughed.
I really was getting better at this lying and pretending thing, because I was able to laugh along. "Abi oh."
I spent Saturday absentmindedly doing house chores and assignments. All my thoughts were on the information Isaac gave me. This PI business was a huge complication. From all the movies I had watched, the private investigators always found out things the police could not. As Theo’s best friend, I would definitely be on the list of people to interview.
If Mummy Timi hired the PI, I was going to get caught. Every time a car showed up next door, I peeked through my curtains, wondering if it was the PI.
On Sunday mummy dragged me to church despite my protests. It was my first time coming to church since Theo’s death and I was dreading the service and all the annoying small talk I would have to make. I joined mummy in the adult service, not looking forward to all the fuss I would get in the Sunday school class.
After the service we were cornered by several church members who wanted to know how the Ogazies were faring. After a long rant from Mummy Daniels about the state of the country and increase in moral decadence and immorality among teenagers, mummy and I excused ourselves and headed for the car park.
We met Jesse leaning against our car. He wore a light blue shirt with dark blue jeans and sneakers. He stood straight when he saw us coming.
"Good morning ma. Hi Kelly." He greeted.
"Good morning." Mummy turned to me with her eyebrows raised.
"How far? " I greeted. The ride home was going to be interesting. Just my luck.
"I … we, that is her friends from Sunday school wanted to check on Kelly. Considering everything that’s happened."
I felt my cheeks grow warm. "Ohh. I’m okay."
"That’s very considerate of you, …"
"Jesse ma."
"He’s Mr Ojo’s son." I blurted.
"Ohhh! I knew you looked familiar. How are your parents?"
"They’re alright ma. Think they are in the church council meeting now."
"That’s good. Greet them for me." Mummy started towards the driver’s seat.
"Thanks for checking on me. That’s nice of you."
"I'm a nice guy. " he smirked. I turned immediately in mummy's direction hoping she didn’t hear him.
"On a more serious note, I really hope yore okay. I would have called but I don’t have your number."
"It's okay. Thank you."
"Sure. By the way. I know what I'm about to say may sound crazy. Just play along."
"Umm ... okay?"
"Do you know this restaurant, Mama Caleb?"
I frowned confused.
"Okay it wasn't you. I knew it. I was there like two weeks ago with my guys and I saw someone that looked exactly like you." He laughed.
No. no. this could not be happening.
"I wasn’t sure shaa. I almost approached the person to say hi, thinking it was you. Thank God I didn’t, that would have been weird." He shook his head bemused.
He frowned at me. "Kelly. What’s wrong? "
Fuck my life.
