My realizationAs someone who has stayed a decent amount of years on this earth and has also experienced a number of events, I observed a lot of human nature or behaviours. I have seen close friendships drift apart and I have seen new ones blossom. At times I stay back and try to remember when I and a particular individual became that close. What was the turning point?
There was this proverb I heard that always comes to mind. It says “20 children can not play together for 20 years.” As I grow older, I come to realise how accurate those words are. You can definitely start out together with a set of people but as time progresses, you will come to the realization that not every one of you shares the same interests again. Some might be pulled to study in a different country, some might suddenly develop an interest in joining the national army, and some might even go on to become a criminal. There is nothing you can do about it, it is just how life is. The oldest friend that comes to mind is one whom I attended primary school with over 14 years ago. I do know we don’t talk every day yet I do know I still feel that kinship bond with him, and no matter what, I’ll be there for him
The word on the streetThe word on the streets says that if you are not in regular communication with someone, then you are not friends. While I do think this is true to an extent I do not believe this is a good metric for determining what a good friendship is like. What is now a good metric for it, you might ask. Well, the thing is, I feel that’s subjective. However, I would say it’s by how much they are there for you. Another realization of adulthood is understanding that everything is transactional and that’s fine.
People are drawn to people who they perceive as valuable. Someone they can be able to gain something from. Now this something can actually be anything. It could be financial support, emotional support, academic support and so on, which is perfectly okay as I said. Heck, what are the perks of having friends if I can’t use them? You might say the wording sounds off but it is what it is and it is fine. I use them and they use me, I understand this balance. Of course, I won’t take advantage of them, they are my friends.