6:45 sharp my alarm went off. It was only Wednesday, but the whole Men’s Day fiasco tired me deeply.
I quickly read my emails, forwarded the boring stuff to Lawrence with a simple “FYI” and jumped in the shower. I had too many thoughts today. My mind was spinning out of control with useless ideas, but mainly, a thought I couldn’t shake off was the lunchtime discussion in the cafeteria and the pressure of “settling down”. I didn’t want to settle down, that was one thing I’ve avoided my whole 35 years of existence. I wasn’t a man in need to start a family, I was at the peak of my career, I was making bank and I was having fun with whoever, whenever. Why would I want to give that up? And why couldn't I shake this weird feeling in my body?
The office seemed noisier than before. The commute was even longer today. The whole day was starting to feel off. Lawrence was drafting emails, typing aggressively on the keyboard, startling the whole space.
“Morning”. I simply nodded while heading to my corner office. Another pile of files was placed carefully on the corner of the glass desk with the same note “Urgent!” attached on top. It felt never ending. I skimmed through the files, kept two of them which seemed more important and carried the rest to Lawrence’s desk.
“We’ve got less than yesterday”. I tried to give off a small, reassuring smile, to portray that we were on the same team.
“Lucky me”, he said, glancing at the pile of urgent folders, now standing on his desk instead of mine.
Lawrence’s been with the company for the past 3 years. I was about to promote him last year, but we had some major cuts in the company, so we couldn’t give him the promotion at that time.
“Nobody gets a promotion this year. It’s been tough times, the market’s volatile. There’s nothing we can do at this time”
“I understand. What can I do to work on my development? I’d like to learn more and get more experience by working more closely with you”.
But that was the thing, men worked harder in their 9-5 because they needed to prove themselves. They hoped they’d be recognized, they hoped for the promotion which would accelerate their careers. I couldn’t be honest with him and tell him that out of the employees who deserved to get promoted, only 4 women got the promotion. Was that a fair judgment? I wasn’t sure. It was a crazy world out there.
I’ve had a couple of meetings with the exec team in regards to a new project we were taking on. It was a massive one for our company and if done right, we could’ve closed a deal worth $70 million.
“We trust you’ll be able to deliver this, Ofelia. You’ve been a great asset for the company, and we count on you to make the right call”.
“Rest assured, Marla. I’ve got it under control”.
I’ve ended the meeting and started spinning in my leather chair, trying to put the pieces together for this M&A. For the first time in a while, I wasn’t sure that what I was doing was right. My mind felt blank.
“Hi, uhm, Ofelia..do you have a moment?” Lawrence peaked through the glass door, looking at me.
“Sure, yeah. How can I help?”
He entered the office timidly and sat on one of the chairs across from me, holding a leather folder in his hands.
“I’ve got an idea for this M&A. They seem like they’re tough to crack, but we can have an angle here”. He handed me the folder and I quickly skimmed through the pages.
“Go on”.
“Well, I’ve run an analysis on their past M&As and the company’s figures dating back 5 years to make a complete picture. It took me a while, but I strongly believe we can convince them to buy this company by stating the portfolio diversity it will come with, and how that will give them an ROI in the next 3 years”.
I was taking in the information he was saying and I couldn’t believe I hadn't thought about it. I was actually angry with myself, that my employee, a man, managed to figure it out before I did.
“Thank you, this is super insightful. You must’ve spent a long time with that analysis, but I’m not sure this is the right angle. Let’s do some more digging”.
He looked slightly disappointed, but nodded his head and went back to his desk. I just couldn’t afford to lose in front of the exec team like that.
**
The M&A Project Meeting was starting in a few minutes. Lawrence and everyone else joined the call.
I was nervous, because I was leading the call and the slides. I’ve asked Lawrence to put together the presentation, make it nice and clear. We went back and forth on the formatting and the overall look of the slides until we got it right. I let him know that his initial analysis was actually good, and we’d be able to present it in the meeting. It was not fair of me to tell him otherwise, which I thought I’d do initially.
“Welcome everyone! Thanks for joining me in this call as I’d like to start by presenting the strategy for our M&A project. I’ve run an extensive analysis on your company’s past projects, as well as the figures dating back 5 years. Please see the summary on this slide. The key here is to understand that this merger will diversify your portfolio with a ROI on the initial value in the next 3 years. It’s a good deal and we’re advising you on the benefits as shown on these graphs”.
“Thank you so much Ofelia. Your analysis and the way you’ve gone about this analysis has shown us why we chose to work with you. Your insights are unmatched”. The company’s partner praised me after the presentation run-through. “We’ll be in touch for next steps, but we cannot wait to work with you on delivering this”.
My exec team looked so pleased. I was thriving with so much emotion that I was able to close this. On the left corner I turned to look at Lawrence, who ended the meeting and left his desk.
There was a prize everyone needed to pay in a woman's world.