People who are prone to internal friction, timid, and lack of methods in interpersonal relationships actually have a weak mentality. Such people are actually overly sensitive and delicate inside, and they can always capture many subtle things.
Moreover, their attention is always focused on themselves. These are all advantages, but they are used in the wrong way. Social interaction is an attack, while they are on the defensive due to their weak mentality.
On the one hand, it is ineffective, and on the other hand, the frustration caused by the wrong direction has become their own internal friction and weakness. The most important three points are:
First, you are not here to make others like you. Casual social interaction should be based on your comfort. If you feel uncomfortable, just leave. People's social interaction does not require others to like you.
You should have a main goal first, and evaluation should be secondary. Just like what Jet Li said, you can dislike me, but you must like me to make money for you. It is not to say that social interaction is purely utilitarian, but that you can be liked by others is a good thing. Even if others don't like you, it's no big deal.
A useful one can make people forget the unpleasantness. In addition, others are also a process of understanding for you, and it is also a process of getting along with you. You can see through people's hearts over time, and you can also change people's evaluation through your own accumulated behaviors. What I mean is that you don't have to worry too much about whether others like you or not.
There are many ways for you to solve it. The key is to move forward and not shrink when encountering difficulties. Don't put on a thick mask and shell to protect yourself.
Secondly, you don't need to fully show yourself in social interaction, nor do you need to be afraid of not being liked by others. Many people are afraid that others won't like the real self, thinking that others will know too much about them and hate them, look down on them and so on.
In fact, this is unnecessary because it doesn't matter. The strong mentality is to adapt to the environment, which means that it is not necessary to use the real self all the time, but to form a set of behavioral patterns. Human nature is neutral.
One thing is true and another thing is false. It is a behavior pattern of self-recognition. You only need to form a set of rules for yourself to do things and behave in society, and even be respected and trusted by others. This is a process of constantly understanding society, constantly correcting and constantly improving.
You are actually fighting against a part of your own human nature, so keep the most authentic part for yourself and show your value and understanding of human nature in social interaction.
Thirdly, your attention should not be too focused on yourself in social interaction, but on the outside world. People always focus on themselves if they have their own attention, which will make them conservative and unable to grasp the laws of the outside world.
Therefore, the strong mentality is to constantly observe everything around them and respond in time, while the weak mentality focuses on their own guesses and shortcomings, so they cannot cope with social interaction in fact. What you need to do is not to shift your attention, because you can't. You have to believe that you are a strong person and that you can do it.
Only then can you shift your attention away from yourself and focus on the outside world to attack. All of this doesn't mean that you have to follow suit and do everything the same way. It's about having a strong mentality.